You just found out your girlfriend is pregnant. She is weighing her options. What are your responsibilities? What’s the right thing to do? You have a lot to think about.
What do you do?
An unplanned pregnancy involves decisions that affect you for the rest of your life. As the father of this baby, you are not only involved, but you will be affected by the decisions that you make.
Your 5 basic choices are:
- Parent the child with your girlfriend
- Help your girlfriend create an adoption plan
- Suggest your girlfriend get an abortion
- Leave the decision up to your girlfriend
- Get out
All of these plans come with big changes and consequences for you. Life Options will give you the resources and information you need to help both of you through this decision.
Life Options is not just for women. Our services include you, and we have male consultants who have been where you are now. We will give you the chance to work through the questions you have with helpful information. Having someone to talk to and support you will help you be strong for yourself and your partner.
It will help to:
Listen.
- Don’t rush her or pressure her.
- Listen to how she is feeling
- Keep the lines of communication open between the two of you.
- Be there for her.
Stay calm.
- She needs your support now more than ever.
- She may be the one who is pregnant but you have both brought a new life into existence. Regardless of where the future of your relationship lies, you are responsible for this pregnancy too.
- Be strong. Be calm. Take one day at a time.
Talk about it.
- Talk to your girlfriend about how you are feeling and what you think.
- Talk to adults that you trust and people who will support you.
- Seek good advice. Be honest.
Get all the facts.
- Gather all of the information you need.
- Make sure that you are knowledgeable about every choice with its pros and cons.
- Help your girlfriend make an informed decision that is safe for her.
What makes the situation worse:
Bailing
- Running away will not make this situation easier for either of you. This seems like the easiest option, but by choosing it you will find you can never escape yourself. The decision to make it easier on yourself at the expense of others will follow you for the rest of your life.
Pressuring her
- You may have different opinions about the path that you should take. It may not be easy, but your goal should be to work together to come to the best decision for everyone.